Why Do I Avoid Difficult Conversations, Uncomfortable Emotions and Self-Reflection?

Dr. John Schinnerer  GuideToSelf.com | LoveIsntEnough.net | TheEvolvedCaveman.com  Avoidance. That sneaky little bastard that convinces you scrolling Instagram is somehow more important than feeling your feelings… having that tough conversation… or, God forbid,...

How Do I Get My Husband to Try Couples Counseling?

You Want to Feel Closer. He Just Wants to Avoid Feeling Attacked. You bring up couples counseling… He shuts down, changes the subject, or says, “We’re fine.” Sound familiar? If your bid for deeper connection is met with resistance, sarcasm, or silence—you are...

What Does a Love Letter From an Anxiously Attached Partner Sound Like?

To my love: I’ve started and stopped writing this letter more times than I can count. Every time I try to find the words, I get scared—scared of saying too much, of being too much. But silence has only ever made the ache louder, and I don’t want to keep hiding what’s...
What Does a Love Letter From an Avoidantly Attached Man Sound Like?

What Does a Love Letter From an Avoidantly Attached Man Sound Like?

By Dr. John Schinnerer | GuideToSelf.com | LoveIsntEnough.net  My Dearest Love, There are words I should have spoken long ago—words buried in the quiet spaces between us. I know that in those silences, my emotional distance may have made you question your value. And...

How Do You Take Other People’s Moods Less Personally?

What’s the biggest gift you can give your loved ones? Help them to take your bad moods less personally. Thirty years ago, the wisest professor I had at UC Berkeley, Meji Singh, dropped this truth bomb on me: “John, we make the mistake of taking 95% of what other...